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Comments on: Thinking http://sandraswanberg.com/blog/2008/11/24/thinking/ Fri, 10 Feb 2012 11:30:24 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6 By: DL http://sandraswanberg.com/blog/2008/11/24/thinking/#comment-518 DL Mon, 24 Nov 2008 14:27:28 +0000 http://sandraswanberg.com/blog/?p=562#comment-518 Sandy - For a blonde chickadee, you're pretty DEEP!!! Never noticed (or even thought about) all the wrap-ups that happen only during this time of year. Very observant of you. It takes a writer's attention to detail, I guess... ;-) Speaking of a writing thing ---> I looked into the Reader's Digest link that you sent me. Not that it would be my sole goal (the loot... well... actually it would be...), RD only pays from $50-400 per article. Just for the heck of it, I went to TexasMonthly.com to look into their criteria... and loot. ;-) First off, no $ amount is ever mentioned so I guess that means the span is wide open. Or not. THEN, this is what absolutely floored me ---> The steps involved with submitting an article are UNBELIEVABLE!!! Each of the steps below are completely independent of each other so... you do the first step. Wait for an answer. If you pass GO, proceed on to the next step (but do NOT collect the $200.) Then Wait Again! Yes or No. Yes, proceed on to the next step. I truly don't have the patience for The Greatest Hoop Show on Earth. You're probably aware of all this anyway but it went something like this: 1/ Send in a pre-writing sample (whatever the hell that would be....) 2/ Send in an outline 3/ Send the article (double-spaced, typed) 4/ You are now assigned a "Fact Checker" 5/ Wait for some sort of confirmation that your facts have been checked 6/ You are now assigned an "editor" 7/ You wait for confirmation from your assigned "editor" 8/ Sign "release" paper saying you agree to having your masterpiece mutilated, changed, tweaked, and shit on. 9/ Make suggested corrections of assigned editor 10/ Re-type (double-spaced, typed) 11/ Resend 12/ Wait for the $ offer to be sent 13/ Agree or (or not) to the Loot Price offered 14/ If Yes, send in the signed form agreeing to whatever the crappy offer is... At this point, after ALL OF THAT ---> who would turn down the sure-to-be insultingly low offer???!!! AND THEN, your article may or MAY NOT even be printed at all!!! AND IF IT IS.... IT COULD BE ANYTIME!!!!! A-N-Y-T-I-M-E!!!!! This year, next year, the 4th leap year in the next century, etc, ect... IT'S JUST A STINKING ARTICLE!!!!! A STINKING ARTICLE THAT WILL BE READ, LAUGHED AT, FORGOT ABOUT, AND THEN DISCARDED ALL IN THE LENGTH OF ABOUT 10 MINUTES!!!!! AFTER RE-LIVING ALL THAT HOOP JUMPING FOR THE 2ND TIME IN THE LAST 3 DAYS, I NEED SOME PROZAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD, WHAT RESPECT I HAVE FOR YOU WRITERS THAT ACTUALLY END OF GETTING AN ARTICLE PUBLISHED!!!! AND A BOOK...? THAT'S EVEN BEYOND MY SCOPE OF COMPREHENSION AT THIS POINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DL Sandy - For a blonde chickadee, you’re pretty DEEP!!! Never noticed (or even thought about) all the wrap-ups that happen only during this time of year. Very observant of you. It takes a writer’s attention to detail, I guess… ;-)

Speaking of a writing thing —> I looked into the Reader’s Digest link that you sent me. Not that it would be my sole goal (the loot… well… actually it would be…), RD only pays from $50-400 per article. Just for the heck of it, I went to TexasMonthly.com to look into their criteria… and loot. ;-) First off, no $ amount is ever mentioned so I guess that means the span is wide open. Or not. THEN, this is what absolutely floored me —> The steps involved with submitting an article are UNBELIEVABLE!!! Each of the steps below are completely independent of each other so… you do the first step. Wait for an answer. If you pass GO, proceed on to the next step (but do NOT collect the $200.) Then Wait Again! Yes or No. Yes, proceed on to the next step. I truly don’t have the patience for The Greatest Hoop Show on Earth.

You’re probably aware of all this anyway but it went something like this:

1/ Send in a pre-writing sample (whatever the hell that would be….)
2/ Send in an outline
3/ Send the article (double-spaced, typed)
4/ You are now assigned a “Fact Checker”
5/ Wait for some sort of confirmation that your facts have been checked
6/ You are now assigned an “editor”
7/ You wait for confirmation from your assigned “editor”
8/ Sign “release” paper saying you agree to having your masterpiece mutilated, changed, tweaked, and shit on.
9/ Make suggested corrections of assigned editor
10/ Re-type (double-spaced, typed)
11/ Resend
12/ Wait for the $ offer to be sent
13/ Agree or (or not) to the Loot Price offered
14/ If Yes, send in the signed form agreeing to whatever the crappy offer is… At this point, after ALL OF THAT —> who would turn down the sure-to-be insultingly low offer???!!!

AND THEN, your article may or MAY NOT even be printed at all!!! AND IF IT IS…. IT COULD BE ANYTIME!!!!! A-N-Y-T-I-M-E!!!!! This year, next year, the 4th leap year in the next century, etc, ect…

IT’S JUST A STINKING ARTICLE!!!!! A STINKING ARTICLE THAT WILL BE READ, LAUGHED AT, FORGOT ABOUT, AND THEN DISCARDED ALL IN THE LENGTH OF ABOUT 10 MINUTES!!!!!

AFTER RE-LIVING ALL THAT HOOP JUMPING FOR THE 2ND TIME IN THE LAST 3 DAYS, I NEED SOME PROZAC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOD, WHAT RESPECT I HAVE FOR YOU WRITERS THAT ACTUALLY END OF GETTING AN ARTICLE PUBLISHED!!!! AND A BOOK…? THAT’S EVEN BEYOND MY SCOPE OF COMPREHENSION AT THIS POINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DL

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